Behind The Eyes...Surgery

The last month has been something else. You start the new year with anticipation of a fresh start, and habits to change or begin. You ask the Lord for strength in certain areas, or to open new doors. You never think that you'd have to be dealing with something hard at the start of the year.

I had a retinal tear in my left eye develop on January 6th, and had laser surgery to repair it on the 7th. I had bleeding in the eye on the 8th, and saw my ophthalmologist on that day and again on Monday the 11th. Apparently part of the retina near the tear was lifting, and I saw a retinal specialist on Wednesday who scheduled a pneumatic retinoplexy surgery(inserting a gas bubble) for Thursday, with laser to follow again on Friday. That was done, and more laser on the following Monday. By Wednesday fluid behind the retina had caused a detachment, and surgery was done on Thursday the 21st. This involved incisions in the eye, draining the vitreous fluid, more laser treatment and a gas bubble that took up 90% of the eye. The bubble helps keep the retina in place. The bubble is now down to 70% , and eventually I will be able to see over. Then, in a few more weeks, it will be gone.

It's been a time of sitting quietly, patiently waiting on the Lord. It's frustrating not being able to drive, and being chauffeured around. Frustrating not to be able to lift things, or help someone you love move into a new apartment. I have no pain; I just can't lift things, be jarred (no jogging)and can't see (temporarily).

I thought about our eyes. About what we look at but don't really see. Matthew 6:22 say our eyes are the lamp of the body; if our eyes are good, the body will be good. John 4:35 says we are to open our eyes and look at the harvest. Many don't see that.

As well as seeing the physical, we are also to see the spiritual. Ephesians 1:18 says that our heart has eyes! And one of my favorites, 2Corinthians 4:18 says we are to fix our eyes on the unseen, not the seen.

Anyway, a fun way to start the year. I have had no pain, I just haven't been able to see out of my left eye. We know that in this human "jar of clay" we will face trials and afflictions, part of suffering. We also know that we are to suffer with our Lord, and be persecuted for our belief. Two types of suffering.

I was back to church Sunday after a three week absence. The Sunday School lesson was a video of Francis Chan talking about suffering ( which I had posted the first two parts here on January 18th and 19th). The music was about trials. The sermon was on suffering and God being our strength. On the way out I picked up a Mission Frontiers newsletter that said on the front, "Recapturing the Role of Suffering". Sunday afternoon I was emailed a link to a story on Matt Chandler, the pastor of the Village Church in Dallas. Matt is battling brain cancer. The story was entitled "Suffering Well". Two types of suffering, woven through the day.

Do we suffer well? We know we will suffer, because Jesus said we would.

That's what I asked myself. Do I suffer well? My suffering is not as drastic as many people face, other at this point not knowing how my vision will be. Others deal with so much more. Cancers, death of a loved one, loss of a limb.

And I've never faced beatings, or torture, or death because of my faith. At least not yet.

The word "joy" is used many times in the Bible. "Great joy", and "greater joy". Only once is the phrase "pure joy" used, and that is James 1 when he talks about trials and persecutions. It seems hard to imagine that we should welcome trials and suffering, but that's what the Word says.

Easier read than done, huh?

We just need to remember that we are called to walk where Jesus walked. We are persecuted with Him. Sometimes it's physical, sometimes emotional or spiritual. Sometimes we are persecuted because of Him. What an intimate attachment with our King.

No matter our trial. or persecution, there is always a light at the need of the tunnel. And perseverance to be learned. Wisdom to be gained.

We also need to remember that our trials, our suffering, our persecution,like the bubble in my eye, are only temporary.